


Deleted Scenes from WWCI Series

by LaMepriseFangirl



Series: What We Carry Inside [3]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M, Female Dean Winchester, Female Dean Winchester/Male Sam Winchester
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-28
Updated: 2015-04-28
Packaged: 2020-02-27 19:18:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 21,575
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18745429
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LaMepriseFangirl/pseuds/LaMepriseFangirl
Summary: A compilation of deleted scenes/alternate versions of events from the What We Carry Inside series.





	1. Alternate First Times for Sam and Dean (PWP)

**Author's Note:**

> (Yeah I backdated it a few years because I don't want this to be the first thing people see when they go on my works page.)
> 
> You are here either because
> 
> a.) you saw the tags and wanted Sam/femme!Dean porn or Sam/OFC porn, in which case I will direct you to chapters 1-2 and 6 respectively,
> 
> or b.) you read _Tophet_ and are interested in reading what could have been and/or more sexy scenes.
> 
> Not all of them are totally finished, but whatever reason you're here for, enjoy.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Three alternate versions of Sam and Dean's first time together in WWCI.

####  **The French Mistake!Verse**

Dean finishes the last of her beer, Sam seizes the opportunity.

"Can I buy you another drink?" he jokes.

Her eyes fix on him.

"I'm kind of a lightweight, so I have to pass." She traces the rim of the bottle with her fingertip. "You tryin' to get me drunk?"

She could be joking, and so could Sam if he stops now, but when is he going to have a better chance to say this?

"No." Something occurs to him and he throws all caution to the wind: "Well, if you're going to be freaked out by me making a pass at you, I guess it doesn't matter if I just come out and say it."

Dean nods in agreement.

"I should probably fuck you just for the sheer audacity of trying to sleep with your own sister in someone else's mansion in a whole 'nother universe."

"W-well, that works. I mean, only if you really want to."

After a few moments of contemplation, during which Sam is sweating and wondering if he should take it back, Dean grins.

"Know what? What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. Fake me and you would be doing it anyway, and we're never gonna have another chance to not be committing incest."

"Are you sure?"

Dean stands up and nods at the living room where there's a sofa.

"Yes. You?"

Sam follows her, both of them removing jackets and shoes on the way.

They don't bother turning on the lamp; they just get naked and then dare to touch each other. Sam takes his sister's face in his hands.

"Show me what you got, Sammy."

He gives her a few soft kisses to start, but quickly graduates to using a little more force, slips her some tongue. His hands feel rough in comparison to her soft skin but she doesn't seem to think it matters; Dean wraps her arms around him as tightly as anyone else ever has.

Damn, it feels good to touch someone, especially someone he's been thinking about for weeks, someone he's really looking forward to pleasuring. He imagines having her spread out with his face between her legs and her whining his name.

"Tell me what you want, Dean," he whispers as he gently bites down on her neck.

"Just touch me."

He squeezes her breasts in his hands, then brushes her nipples with his thumbs.

"Good?"

"Yes."

"How long can I do this before you beg me to touch you somewhere else, or at least fuck you?"

"Sit down, Sam," Dean says, shrugging off his hands.

He obeys, drinking in every inch of her body he can make out in the low light.

She drops to her knees in front of him. Sam spreads his legs and moves closer to the edge of the seat, barely believing in reality.

Dean gives good head, and soon Sam nudges her face away from his dripping cock.

"I wanted to lay you down and fuck you," he confesses.

"Only if you have a condom and lube."

"Oh fucking hell, forget it. Just lemme touch you again."

Dean seems happy enough to straddle her brother; he makes her a lot happier when he reaches between her legs. He explores the wet folds with his fingers, watching her reactions.

Then she gasps sharply and her grip on his body tightens, so Sam stays there, gently massaging that small spot. His free hand guides her face close for another kiss.

"Enjoying yourself?" he asks after a lot of long, wet, deep kissing. He's moving faster, harder.

"Yes. I'm gonna come soon, Sam, fuck."

He can believe that. His hand is soaked and she's thrusting her hips against him like she can't help it. And God he does need to finish her soon because if he doesn't get more friction soon he'll go insane.

As if reading his thoughts, Dean reaches between them to rub the underside of his cock with her fingers. It's nowhere near enough; she must know that, but it's almost relief for how fucking hard he is. Dean's too close to be able to manage anything more intricate anyway.

"Sam..." Gasps, heavy breathing, tensing and quivering of her most private parts, and the softest possible shriek. "Sam, Sam, Sam..." she whimpers as she writhes around him. He works her through it, waiting for the moment it stops being pleasurable.

She's panting as she pushes his hand away.

"Fuck, that was good."

Without further preamble she wipes some of the slick off his hand with her palm, and then starts to stroke his cock. He thrusts up into her hand, eyes falling shut as he lets his head rest on the back of the sofa.

"How is it, Sammy?"

"Don't even think about stopping."

"But is it good?"

"It's fucking great," he breathes. It gets even better when Dean slicks her palm up again. He holds on to her thighs, squeezing tighter as he gets close.

"I'm going to come, Dean."

She rises up slightly, so she can whisper in Sam's ear.

"I kinda wanted you to fuck me, too."

"Shit, Dean."

"Now come. Like you would if you were inside me."—come spurts between their bodies—"Think about it."—more is added to what's being smeared on sweating skin—"Me underneath you."—his body must be spent now—"Loving it."

Sam gives one short groan as the last of his release spills over Dean's fingers.

"...So we're gonna pretend we never did this?" he asks.

"Yes."

He kisses Dean as gently as he can for as long as she lets him.

" _Now_ we can start pretending this didn't happen."

* * *

####  **In the Impala I**

Sam slowly pushes himself up, leaning against the car for support. The pain is fading fast and Dean is almost there.

"Sammy? You alright?" She's checking him for wounds, absently tucking his hair back, giving him a frantic peck on the lips.

Both of them freeze.

"Did- did you just kiss me?"

"No," Dean answers. She lays her hand flat on his chest. "I'll show you what it's like to be kissed by Dean Winchester."

Sam lets her do most of the leaning in, but he closes the last inch, pressing their mouths together. He doesn't care whether she's good, he just wants to kiss and hold her. But Dean is good at this, and she has nice soft lips, and she smells nice, and Sam doesn't know if he can accept only this.

Tongues come into play quickly and he can't imagine Dean doesn't know how turned on he is. There's a sudden sense of shyness. If she were anyone else he'd have a hand around her waist pressing her close, making damn sure she knew. Now he's unsure whether he can treat Dean like any other lover.

They break apart, Dean taking half a step back. They stare at each other.

Without breaking eye contact, Sam feels along the side of the car until he finds the handle. He opens the door to the backseat.

"You get in first," Dean says, so Sam does. She follows immediately, shutting the door behind her.

They're awkwardly turned towards each other, sitting in the backseat, and one second of indecision feels like an hour.

Once that second is over, they don't need to say anything. Dean moves to straddle his lap and Sam doesn't pull her close yet but just kisses her, resting his hands on her hips.

Breathing gets heavier. Dean slips off her jacket and unbuttons her shirt about halfway, keeping Sam occupied with her mouth. He's almost afraid to look, that it will break some sort of spell.

The strip of skin and bra revealed are tantalizing. And he thought it was bad just having her legs spread over his cock. He reaches in with both hands, pushing the front of the shirt open. Dean inhales sharply at the first touch, her chest rising slightly.

Sam gently pulls one of her breasts out of her bra and brushes his thumb over the nipple. Dean makes a soft sound, so he lowers his head and licks it. She presses forward in response and Sam smiles. He kisses her neck a few times before returning to her breast, this time sealing his lips around the tiny bud and flicking it with his tongue.

"Damn..." she whispers. She takes one of his hands and pulls it out of her shirt, then tugs it downward. She presses the heel of his palm against the crotch of her jeans and uses her hand to massage herself with Sam's.

Sam's psychological pleasure continues to grow. Dean is honestly getting off on this, and soon they can get all the stupid clothes out of the way and become one.

His physical pleasure is being neglected, but he kind of likes it in this case. This is about Dean, about showing her how much he loves and needs his sibling. And how sick he is without his brother.

He draws away and kisses her neck again.

"You're so fucking wet for me," he murmurs, grinding up into the damp denim between her legs.

"Let me suck you," Dean replies.

Sam feels pre-come spreading in the fabric of his briefs. He unbuckles his belt and shoves everything halfway down his thighs as Dean moves onto her hands and knees on the seat next to him. She's on him almost immediately, stiff tongue against the sensitive spot beneath the head.

"Ah...!"

"You like that?" she says before going to work, wrapping her lips around him and demonstrating her expertise.

Sam breathes a "yes" and reaches to fondle her breast as she pleasures him. He doesn't care whether this is foreplay or if she finishes him like this; he's still finding it incredible that Dean is choosing to do this for him.

"Dean," he gasps as he feels a new peak of pleasure. He struggles not to thrust into her face. He wonders, if he tells her that he's going to come, will she finish him with her hand, or will she let him keep feeling her warm, wet tongue and mouth, maybe even swallow.

That's such an intimate yet dirty thought, Dean swallowing her brother's come. Sam isn't able to warn her before his release fills her mouth. She doesn't seem fazed by it; she carefully works him through orgasm, coaxing out a couple more spurts of come when she uses her hand.

Some of it spills out of her mouth as she pulls off. After swallowing, Dean carefully licks Sam's cock clean, and finally straightens up.

"Sorry I didn't warn you," Sam says.

"Don't worry about it."

"Then get your pants off and get back over here."

Dean obeys, quickly shedding her jeans and panties and leaving them on the floor as she straddles his lap again.

Sam wishes he was hard again already. There are no barriers between them; it's just hot skin and slickness.

"I wanted to feel you come while you were on my cock."

"Maybe next time," Dean says. She lowers her hips and Sam exhales with a little more force as he feels her slickness on his thigh. "Gonna help me, Sam?"

He gently starts to explore her wet inner lips with his fingertips, watching and listening for her reaction.

Soon he finds the spot that makes her twitch, and doesn't leave it. Dean starts to fumble with her brother's clothes. She unbuttons enough to bare his chest and press her body against him. It's a little awkward with one breast outside her bra and the other still securely in the cup so Sam manages to reach and undo her bra single-handedly.

"Someone's had practice," Dean says, clearly impressed.

Sam grins as she pulls the straps from her shoulders and lets the bra fall as far as it can. There's no way she's getting it off with a long-sleeved shirt on, but Sam has plenty of access. He starts licking at one breast and gets to work on the other with his free hand. Sure, she'd come if he just rubbed her clit, but he wants Dean to feel incredible, not just pleasured.

"Ohhh..." She's trying to press into every point of contact between them. "Harder, please," she moans.

Sam doesn't know for sure where she's referring to so he increases the vigor in both sets of fingers as well as his tongue.

She actually cries out. Within a few seconds her body is tensing, the grip she has in the back of his neck and head tightens, and Sam can't call the sounds she's making anything but screams of pleasure.

She spreads her legs wider still and pushes down until Sam's hand is trapped between her pussy and his thigh. It can do nothing but provide more friction as she's in the throes of orgasm.

He loves it, knowing he brought her to this ecstasy. He keeps his tongue stiff as he flicks it over her nipple, hoping to extend her pleasure.

"Sam...!"

He smiles against her breast as she starts to go limp but doesn't tell him to stop.

Eventually she stills the fingers beneath her with a touch on his wrist. She seems content for his hand to stay pressed against her most intimate parts, though.

Sam leaves her nipples be, and kisses her neck.

To his surprise, the next thing Dean does is shrug off her shirt and then toss her bra on the floor of the car. It's a little strange to have his pants down to just above his knees but everything else mostly in place with Dean naked in his lap. He is sweaty so he loses the jacket and both of his shirts. Dean seems very pleased and presses her body against his, arms around his neck. He has one hand cupping her ass and the other lightly stroking her back.

He's not opposed to cuddling in the afterglow, but cuddling right now leaves him time to think about what they've done.

Dear God, he had sex with his brother. While his brother was his sister.

"What are you going to say, six months from now, when you're back to normal?"

"Sammy, all I know is what I want to say now."

"And what's that?"

"That you give a girl a real good time."

* * *

####  **IN THE IMPALA II**

It begins to rain just before they take out their shovels. "Rain" is too gentle of a word. "Downpour" is more accurate.

Both of them get drenched instantly. It's a cold rain, too, and they mutually decide without even discussing it to wait out the storm in the car.

They each have a change of clothes, so with some careful maneuvering, they turn their backs on each other in the front seat and take off every stitch of wet clothing, which is to say every stitch of clothing.

Sam, although embarrassed, knows it's nothing his sister hasn't seen before, so he just calmly goes about putting on jeans and a t-shirt. Going commando isn't his favorite thing, but it's better than being in soaked clothing.

"Hey, Sam, you know how you said you haven't seen my tits?"

It takes every single fraction of an ounce of willpower not to whirl his head around.

"...Yeah?"

"...Damn, you're good. I never could've kept my back turned."

"Just because you make a hot chick doesn't mean you're some kind of succubus."

Sam turns then, keeping his eyes well above chest level, only to find Dean is dressed. Sort of. She doesn't have a bra under her t-shirt, a fact emphasized briefly and then hidden when she puts on her flannel.

She doesn't seem to notice where Sam's attention was and instead begins to lay out her wet clothes as well as Sam's, on the back seat and the back of the front seat.

She put her underwear between them on purpose, Sam thinks.

This time, she notices his lingering gaze, but says nothing. Instead she shrugs off her flannel.

"So, Sam, what am I? Nine? Ten?"

"Oh, you're a ten alright."

"...What state?"

He smirks at her.

"Maybe a Montana ten."

"Fuck you."

"Dean, I'm not going to sit here and stroke your ego."

"That's not the most strokable thing in here, Sammy."

"...Are you trying to pick me up?"

"No, I'm trying to see how uncomfortable I can make you."

"I'm fine," Sam says, knowing that getting too uncomfortable too early will just give away his insane attraction.

To his shock, she slides across the seat and gets up in his space, using her arms to push her tits out a little.

"Where'd you learn that trick, high school?" he asks, very deliberately looking at her chest and back at her face. Unfortunately he can still feel his body reacting to the closeness of a female body in this intimate setting.

"I'm not seducing you, Sam. I'm making you uncomfortable." She rests her hand on his thigh. Not his knee, definitely his thigh, and unfortunately rather close to his cock which is still mostly soft at this point.

"You're gonna have to try harder than that," he says, trying to sound more bored than anything else.

"Try... harder, Sam?" she mocks. "How _hard_ should I try?"

He sighs.

"Look, you can grab my crotch if you want, but that doesn't mean anything. You know that."

"I'm not gonna. I'm just gonna stay here and make you look at my t-shirt and think about how I don't have any underwear on. And you don't either."

"We're not in a porno, Dean. If we were, your shirt would be a tearaway."

She pouts in agreement.

Then she swings a leg over both of Sam's, leaving him trapped underneath her. She had to move her hand on his leg slightly, and when the erotic position sinks in with Sam, his cock begins to rise just enough to shift his jeans.

She notices, but rather than pounce on the opportunity, she decides to make absolutely certain.

"So, Sam. Is this making you uncomfortable, or too comfortable?"

She caresses her breast with her right hand, brushing the nipple through the fabric. It stiffens, and Sam's body follows suit.

Dean clearly wants to look down, but she doesn't. She squeezes his thigh, tightening the denim against his cock.

His tongue is practically hanging out of his mouth as he watches her continue to stimulate her nipple. She's not just messing with him; she's touching herself.

"Dean," he whispers, putting his hand over the one on his thigh. He should stop this.

Dean shifts her grip. Sam's jeans rub against his member in a rough but pleasurable way.

She did that on purpose. And her fingers are still working, pinching and rubbing that one little spot. It's all Sam can do not to push her shirt out of the way and put his mouth on her.

"I'm your brother," he whispers.

"Do you really care?"

His lips part, but he can't think of an answer.

Her hands leave their respective positions, and then he hears a zipper.

"I dare you."

"Dare me to what?" he breathes.

"I just dare you, Sam."

He looks down and sees skin within her open jeans. Biting his lip, he rests his hands on her hips and uses his thumbs to pull the fabric away from her body. She's shaved bare.

He's nearly shaking. They've started to cross the line. Now what?

He leans in and sniffs her hair, mouths at her throat. She leans in, glad to let him do it.

He kisses the soft flesh under his lips, then moves his head lower, pressing his face to her breasts. They're so soft and nice to feel and see.

He mouths at her nipple through her shirt. She exhales sharply, almost a moan.

Dean tentatively lifts her shirt, exposing her breasts to him.

Sam kisses the nipple closer to his mouth; Dean moans softly.

He kisses the other one, and then seals his mouth over it, flicking his tongue.

"Oh..." his sister moans. She removes her shirt entirely and then holds Sam's head to her chest. "Oh, Sam..."

He's so hard he has absolutely no choice but to unzip his jeans and take out his cock.

"Sam, I- Fuck, I don't know what you're doing but I want your cock in me so bad now, just- Oh..." Dean is shifting her body slightly, like she's trying to roll her hips. "I didn't know it was like this," she whispers.

With some difficulty, she pulls her jeans down to her ankles without forcing Sam to detach his mouth from her body.

"Will you fuck me, Sam?" she asks.

"Yes," he says.

Dean wastes no time in moving closer and guiding his cock into her body.

It feels like the first time he was ever inside a girl, Sam thinks. It's earth-shattering and fills him with physical joy and satisfaction, because his body was meant to be there.

They start moving, Dean a little awkwardly in her inexperience, but soon they match each other's rhythm.

"This might be over kinda quick," Sam apologizes.

"Gotta history of finishing quickly?"

"No, I just... this is the hottest sex I've had in forever."

"It's dirty, is what it is."

They don't use more than one or two words until Sam is nearly there.

"Fuck, I gotta pull out," he pants.

Dean raises her hips high enough that his cock slips free.

The sight of her hot, slick pussy almost does him in, and when he sees the absolute mess she's made of his jeans, he gives his cock a single pull and he's gone, shooting straight onto Dean's cunt.

"Fuck," he curses, because that was the last place he wanted to get his come, and that's just about the hottest thing that could've happened.

He looks up at Dean, who is equally mesmerized by his come on her pussy.

"Damn," she says. She spreads her outer lips with one hand. "Rub it in me, Sam."

"But-"

"I don't care. Rub it in."

He reaches out with two fingers and rubs his come into her skin, and into the hot slick folds between her legs. He finds her clit and then she gasps sharply.

"Yes! Touch me, Sam, please!"

He pleasures her until she shudders and gives a high whimper as she reaches climax.

She collapses against his chest, breathing hard, and he runs his hand over her smooth back.

"I just fucked my sibling," he says.

She straightens up.

"It was good, wasn't it?"

"Yeah, but... fuck, Dean. This is messed up." Sam openly stares at her tits.

"Nobody has to know."


	2. More Explicit Sam/Dean (PWP)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> PW(a little)P

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not sure why the POV changes in the last one, but at least it's steamy.

####  **Anger Sex After Agreeing to Stop Going After Mia (Tophet Ch. 5)**

Sam and Dean leave the dead meatsuit where it falls, and trudge back to the car. Without speaking, they get in and Dean puts the car in drive.

When they're nearing the motel, Sam begins to be afraid.

"Dean."

Her silence is an acknowledgement.

"You didn't mean it back there, did you? When you said we would back off?"

"Of course I meant it."

"So, what, we're just going to give up?"

"We don't have a choice, Sam."

"I can't-" Sam's eyes fill with tears. "How am I supposed to live with myself when I know she's out there?"

"How are you going to live with yourself if we try to get her back and Crowley kills her?" Dean snaps. "Will you feel better because you did what you could, because you didn't give up?"

They get out of the car and stomp into the motel room before resuming the conversation.

"We'll find a way, Dean. We have to. Whatever it takes, we're going to get Mia away from Crowley, alive."

"We both know his mooks are under orders to hurt her if we get close."

"Then we get close without them knowing."

"How?"

"We'll find a way," Sam repeats.

Dean shoves her brother.

"No. We are not giving Crowley any excuses to hurt her!"

"He'll hurt her no matter what we do."

Grabbing Sam by the front of his jacket, Dean growls:

"The one way to guarantee that Mia gets killed is by going after her. We have to make the choice that gives her a fucking chance."

"I won't leave her with demons." He shakes off his sister, who eyes him.

"Why aren't you punching me?"

"I don't hit-" Sam cuts himself off but it's too late.

"You don't hit what, women? It was okay to beat me up when I had a dick but now it's not?" Dean throws a punch, which Sam doesn't try to dodge or counter.

Tasting blood, he presses the back of his hand to his mouth.

"Look, if someone sees you with me and you're covered with bruises-"

"Bull. Shit. You still don't think I'm Dean, do you? You just see a weak and feeble sister who can't take a hit."

Sam takes a swing. He will not be accused of not seeing Dean as Dean. If part of their sick relationship is beating the shit out of each other, so be it.

They're more evenly matched than the last time they fought hand-to-hand, which was the day Dean got pregnant. Back then, Dean was still not completely used to fighting in her body, and Sam's soullessness was an advantage, letting him ignore most of the pain she did manage to cause. That fight hadn't lasted long, but this time, they're tussling for long seconds, Sam very slowly gaining the upper hand.

He gets Dean into a good hold, her back to his front, only to be thrown off guard by her grinding her hips against his crotch. She frees herself and they continue to throw punches, Sam wondering what the hell gave her the idea to distract him like that.

He manages to grab her again, this time prepared for Dean's trick, even when she continues the motion. He feels an unusual anger even as his blood runs south.

"What the hell are you doing, Dean?" he demands, pushing her halfway across the room, against the wall.

"Hitting you below the belt," she chuckles, half her face smushed against the peeling paint. "If I can punch you in the face, why can't I bring your dick into it?"

"Because..." Offhand Sam can't think of a good argument against it. Then he drags Dean over to the bed and pins her on her back. "If you don't stop, I'm going to fuck you with it."

"Oh, so you'll rape me?"

"You brought sex into this."

Dean shoves him off, onto the floor, then gets him in a chokehold.

"Sex, fighting, that's not the point, Sam. The point is that you are not listening to me. You can't go after Mia, or so help me God, I will stop you."

"No, you won't!" Sam finds a new strength and flips their positions, holding Dean down with the entire weight of his body. "You forced her to give up a normal life to save mine. And I'm going to take her from Crowley and give her the life she was meant to have, or die trying."

Instead of answering, Dean undulates her hips, trying to grind against Sam's dick again. She succeeds.

"I said stop touching me," he growls.

"Yeah, and what are you gonna do about it?" She smiles up at him.

"What I said I was gonna do."

"Yeah right, like you could make yourself do that to me."

Sam tears open her jeans and shoves his hand in.

"Pretty dry, Dean. This is gonna hurt."

"No it's not. 'Cause you won't do it."

"You have one more chance-"

She frees her hand and gropes him yet again.

"Okay then," Sam says. Before Dean realizes what's happening, he's hauling her up partway onto the nearest bed, leaving her hips at the edge of the mattress. Despite her struggling, he shoves her jeans down to her ankles, then folds her legs up over her chest, practically bending her in half.

"Very funny, Sam," she says, losing some of her bravado.

"Sure is. I told you if you didn't stop touching me, I'd fuck you. You kept touching me. Now you're gonna bleed like a virgin."

Dean watches in surprise as he takes out his cock and slicks it up with spit. He pushes her panties to the side and guides himself inside her, which is a slow, difficult process. She squeezes her eyes tight, face twisted in pain.

"I've never tried to fuck anyone so tight, Dean." Sam bites his lip. It's hurting him, too. "Try to relax."

She actually does try, and Sam tests the waters.

"Show me your body."

Clumsily and slowly, Dean manages to remove her jacket and shirt.

"Keep going."

She takes off her bra and tosses it to the side.

"Shit..." Sam had missed being with her. He pulls partway out and then pushes in again, pleasure running through his body. There's a stab of guilt as Dean flinches again.

She still doesn't say anything, but she's not resisting anymore. She's letting this happen and Sam isn't sure if she's surrendered or if she wants to enjoy this with him.

He pulls out and removes the rest of Dean's clothes, and his. Wordlessly he moves her body to the center of the bed, head resting on the pillows, before entering her again. She's not as tight or dry, but it still hurts her, so he goes slow. Her arms tentatively wrap around him and he presses his cheek to hers as their bodies rub together, harmonizing instead of conflicting.

Dean reaches down to touch herself as Sam pumps in and out of her. She doesn't turn away from a kiss on her cheek, or on the lips.

They know each other too well to have to speak. They can watch each other's faces as they climax, feel peace and pleasure in their hearts until they fall apart next to each other.

Dean curls up against Sam; he's too afraid to spoil the moment and they end up falling asleep together.

§§§

Burying her face in Sam's chest, Dean inhales deeply. Her little brother has never smelled so good.

She smiles to herself as she runs her fingers up and down his morning wood. It's always fun waking up to someone you like touching you.

On cue, Sam's eyelids flutter open.

"Good morning," Dean says.

"Good morning," he replies. He doesn't seem so cheerful, so Dean takes her hand back.

"What even happened last night?" Sam asks her.

"First off, I wasn't expecting you to whip it out. Then you put your hands on me and, well, you were there."

Sam shuffles back a couple inches and pulls the sheet down to look at Dean's body. She feels special when Sam looks at her with an appraising eye, when the prude who would go months without getting laid looks at her and gets hard. She props herself up on one elbow and licks her lips as she waits.

Sam notices but ignores it.

"It was still pretty fucked up," he comments.

"I don't think that's really the problem here."

Sighing, Sam rubs his eyes.

"Mia. Or... Tophet."

"Sammy, you know what's going to happen if you don't stop. You _know_ that the safest thing is to leave her alone."

"She's with Crowley. He chopped off her finger."

"We've lost, Sam. We have to accept that."

"I can't."

"We've accepted it before, haven't we? Ellen and Jo died in that explosion. Our half-brother is in a cell with two archangels. Cas might still be alive in Purgatory but we can't go barking up that tree."

"All of those people made choices, Dean. Mia didn't."

"Yeah, I did. Now you've got a choice: keep going after her and get her killed, or give her a chance to live?"

Flopping onto his back, Sam covers his face with his hands.

"How do I let her go?" his muffled voice asks. "She's an innocent baby. She's mine."

"I'm begging you, Sam. I'm asking, as your sister, stop. Let Mia go."

Sam's body begins to shake, and Dean realizes with a pang of regret that he's sobbing, silently but harder than he has in years. He's crying all the tears that she had in the weeks after giving up Mia.

Minutes pass, and Dean lays her head on the pillow next to Sam's, so that he knows she's still there. She's not going anywhere until he's done and has an answer for her.

After an even longer time—Dean notices that the angle of the morning sunlight has changed—Sam lowers his hands and wraps his arms around Dean. She can't see his face as he crushes her in a tight hug, but he speaks very clearly:

"I'd stop, Dean. I'd stop because you're my sister and you begged me to. But what do I say if she finds me someday and asks why I stopped?"

"You tell her the truth. You stopped because if you didn't, she would die. You stopped because you love her."

"Would that be enough if you were in her shoes?"

* * *

####  **When They Get Back to the Motel Late During the Kitsune Hunt (Tophet Ch. 10)**

"We told Tophet not to wait up. She's the one person who'd listen to us." He nudges her back until she falls onto the bed. "Are you really worried or just playing hard to get?"

"I'm always into it when you're being a horndog, Sammy."

Sam flips her over and grinds against her ass.

"You like it when I get impatient, get rough? When I take a little for myself before letting you have yours?"

"You know me so well."

"Then tell me yes or no."

"You really wanna do this the one time she's right on the other side of the wall? Maybe she can't hear you, but she's gonna wonder what kind of fantasies I'm into."

"We haven't shared a room since we brought her to the bunker. I'd go crazy knowing you're in the other bed," Sam explains.

"So you're offering this instead of just jerking off in the bathroom. Considerate, Sammy."

Dean throws him off and scrambles to pin his hips down.

Sam grins at her and presses her face against the bulge in his jeans. It's their little game; he pulls her closer and she tries to pull away. There's something about fighting but letting Sam win, letting him force her to serve his body, that relaxes Dean, helps her unwind. Her little brother, meanwhile, is used to doing what she says, but he will take absolute control in bed when Dean wants him to.

Finally she submits and nuzzles at the warm denim. With difficulty, she unzips his fly with her teeth and then waits for him to pull his cock out.

Once she wraps her lips around him, Sam's fingers are gentle in her hair. He caresses her, strokes her neck, whispering praise as if she hasn't gone down on him literally a thousand times by now and as if she's doing anything remotely special.

"This isn't gonna take long," he groans after what feels like barely any time, shifting his hips. "Goddamn..."

He finally bothers to remove his shirts, at which point Dean starts stroking his shaft with her hand while flicking the head with her tongue.

"Dean..." His hands are in her hair again, just to feel as much of his sister as he can. With a sharp gasp and his eyes shut tight, he comes into her mouth.

"What are you, fifteen?" she scoffs. "Can't hold it together when your dick gets sucked."

Tucking himself away, Sam hasn't gotten his breath back before Dean attacks with a kiss. Which she specifically did not wipe her mouth before giving.

"Dude," Sam complains.

She gives him a smile as she undresses.

Sam's response is to flip them over and make her lie still as he takes her clothes off for her.

"How do you want yours?" he whispers in her ear.

"Surprise me."

He turns her onto her stomach and reaches underneath her, trapping her and his hand under her body with his weight as he fingers her.

Sam takes her just as high as she imagined, then keeps her teetering on the edge, with smooth, gentle, consistent strokes of his fingers, soft lips on her neck, and sweet words in her ear.

"I can't wait until we share a room again. I miss waking you up with my face between your legs."

Dean just moans a little to agree.

"And you know how I feel when I open my eyes and you're rubbing yourself against my dick. Love your face when you're just pleasuring yourself."

She makes a higher pitched noise. She's close, hips fighting against her brother's but unable to move. Again, the struggle that she's guaranteed to lose, but to someone she trusts.

Dean presses her face into the mattress to muffle the near-shriek when she hits climax.

When her ecstasy fades and Sam finally withdraws his hand, Dean turns her head and he lays his next to it, facing her. They give each other lazy smiles.

"Worth it," Sam says.

"What is?"

"We risked Tophet finding out about us. Guess we'll find out in the morning, but either way, this was worth it."

"Damn straight. ...Let's sleep in your bed."

Sam kisses her as a yes.

* * *

 

####  **Unabridged Version of Dean Not Catching Any STIs in Tophet Ch. 17**

To celebrate, she finds her one sexy negligee and puts on her darkest red lipstick along with a few other touches of makeup. She's sitting on the bed, legs crossed, when Sam comes into the room.  
  
In black lace and satin, she smiles at him seductively and tries not to laugh at the hilarious speed at which his dick rises.

He takes off his shirt in one motion as he moves forward and physically picks her up. He puts her on top of the dresser and kisses her neck, slowly dragging his hands over the satin covering her body.

"And you said lipstick wasn't a turn-on," she laughs.

Sam doesn't seem to care about her teasing, all he cares about right now is friction. He picks her up again and sits on the bed. He spreads his legs so she has nothing to sit on, but rather than let her hang onto him or otherwise support herself, he holds her ass with both hands and forcibly grinds her body against his cock.

"Yeah, Sam, show me how hot you get when I make myself pretty for you."

He practically growls as he pauses long enough to hold her body in one arm and tear his sweatpants out of the way. He shoves the waistband under his balls and resumes his needy, desperate rubbing off.

"Sam, this is fun and all, but-" She's cut off when he bites her neck and then falls back on the bed. He shoves his cock into her panties from below, and then makes her sit up.

The head of his cock is sticking out of her waistband, and she lifts the hem of the negligee to see it.

"God, you're obsessed," she sighs, and snakes a finger into her panties. The lace isn't going to hold up with his cock, too, Sam thinks, but god it's good watching the shape of her hand working, pleasuring herself while he gets to just see this incredibly sexy creature.

"You couldn't be hotter right now," Sam says, rolling his hips. The friction is slight but pleasant.

"You wanna bet?" Dean extricates her hand and his dick from her panties, then she moves closer, straddling his chest.

His hands are on her hips, and she smells so good he starts reaching for his dick. Dean allows him two strokes before taking his hand away.

She raises her body a few inches over him, and then hikes up her negligee.

"Hold the panties out of my way so I can work."

Sam uses the first finger on each hand to pull the waistband down, stretching it, until her pussy is in full view.

"Thanks." Dean starts to finger herself, moaning much louder than she has to.

"Dean..."

"What?"

"You were right, this is hotter."

She rewards him by shuffling forward, closer to his face.

He licks his lips without thinking about it. Yes, please, he thinks. Closer. The wet sounds are driving him crazy.

"Bet you're dying to touch yourself," she moans. "I bet you're so hard it hurts."

"Yes." Sam lets himself fuck the air.

"I'll let you touch yourself, but not your dick. Maybe your balls."

"Dean..."

"Those are the rules for now."

Sam reaches down and fondles his sac. It doesn't feel as good so much as it teases him, but it's better than being untouched. If he's rough on the part closest to his cock, he can almost... Yeah, pull and push at the flesh there and his cock gets a little friction.

Dean watches his face as he does this, and smiles at the relief in his sigh when he finds a way to relieve the burning need in him. She leans forward, her pussy just inches from his face. His free hand tugs harder on her panties.

He sticks out his tongue and flickers it in invitation, and Dean moans a little.

She strokes herself and then offers the wet finger to Sam, who eagerly licks it clean.

He wants her so badly as she resumes pleasuring herself, so so so close to his mouth. He's only getting the slightest friction to help and God, she's just so hot like this.

"Dean, let me touch you. I'll use my mouth."

Without a word, she pulls her hand and his away from their respective tasks, and grinds her lace-covered cunt over his mouth.

"Like that, Sammy?"

"I want to taste you."

"Then taste me." She presses down against his protruding tongue. "Let's see what you can do through these, huh? I know you love seeing 'em on me."

Sam does what he can, and loves it when she grinds again.

"How about I get this all over your face, huh?" Dean asks.

"Mm," Sam agrees. He closes his eyes and lets her mark him.

There's slick on his forehead, his cheeks, and his chin, and she's still there and hot for him. He grabs her hips again and surprises her by holding the crotch of her underwear to the side as he dives in with his tongue.

Dean comes in seconds, screaming his name.

"Now ride my cock before you lose it," he urges. Dean moves back down and immediately takes his cock in her hand, gets the head in her panties, and rubs her clit against it. She's moaning as she makes her climax last, and Sam could come just from watching her desperately humping his dick, forget about feeling the friction, feeling her sticky wetness run down the shaft. He can't even see what's actually happening; it's hidden by satin, but his sister's face as she pleasures herself tells him everything.

Her orgasm finally fades, but Sam isn't done. Dean doesn't even ask before sinking down on it, taking it into her body.

He gives her a few thrusts, but what he really wants, he isn't sure.

"You wanna come somewhere special?"

"Yeah."

"On this." She holds the hem of her garment down so Sam can't see his cock disappearing into her body.

"Yeah." He pulls out and flips them over, then gets back inside her. "Let me get close."

He fucks her hard and fast, and when he's almost there he almost doesn't pull out in time because he missed being inside her so much, but he manages, and his cock is soaked and throbbing, untouched, and he simply looks down at Dean, beautiful and fucked and wanting it, and he comes with with a groan.

He sees the come on her lingerie and gives himself a few more strokes to milk it out, to get every bit of pleasure from this moment.

Dean's hand drifts down, but Sam beats her to it and in no time at all she comes again.


	3. Sam and Dean Meet Tophet

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is an incredibly old draft written probably before I finished WWCI, from a version of the story in which Sam and Dean a.) never learned Crowley renamed Mia b.) Tophet's powers were different and c.) Tophet ran away from Crowley and started causing magical trouble to get Sam and Dean's attention.

"Good timing," is the first thing Sam says to the teenage girl, catching her by the arm.

She is silent, studying him with an uncomfortable intensity, made all the more unsettling by her lazy eye.

"I got her," Sam calls out to his sister. A moment later, Dean rounds the corner.

"So you're the kid who's been messing with everybody's heads."

"I can mess with yours, too, if I feel like it," the girl replies.

"What's your name?" Sam asks, loosening his grip.

"Tophet."

"Toe-fit?"

"Yeah, Tophet."

"You got a last name?"

"...MacLeod."

"Alright, Tophet MacLeod, here's what's gonna happen. You're gonna explain how and why you're doing it. You're gonna stop doing it. And then we'll take you to your house and be on our way."

"Okay," Tophet replies, as if she had a choice in the matter. She probably does.

"Let's find a place to sit down and chat. Somewhere with a lot of people around, so nobody feels threatened, huh?" Dean waits for a response.

There is none.

"There's a park a few blocks from here," Sam remembers.

*

Tophet refuses to answer any questions until they sit down at a picnic table with a minimal amount of bird crap. Mostly for appearances, Sam and Dean sit on opposite sides of the table. Tophet chooses to sit next to Sam.

"How long have you been doing this?" Dean asks.

"My father says it's probably been in me my entire life. We didn't know until I was about eleven."

"How'd it start?"

"Bad headaches. Then weird dreams. Daddy started testing me to find out what my abilities were. Once I started using my powers, the headaches and dreams stopped."

Sam and Dean exchange glances.

"Who's your dad?"

"Someone who knows a lot about this stuff."

"Yeah, but what's his name?"

She does not deign to answer.

"Can you tell us about your mom?" Sam tries.

Turning her head, Tophet directs her answer toward him.

"All I know about her is that she probably did a lot of drinking when she was pregnant and she left me with Daddy the day I was born."

It is very difficult not to look at Dean. Out of the corner of his eye, Sam notices her shift.

"What exactly can you do, Tophet?"

"You could say I read _and_ write minds. The closer I am to a person the more clearly I can hear their thoughts and the more I can put into their heads." She looks around and then nods at a man standing a good twenty yards away. "It wouldn't be detailed but I can tell you what he's thinking about. If I wanted to I could make him feel an emotion or an urge. He'd mistake it for having that feeling in relation to what he's thinking about."

Sam is a little scared and he wonders if she's warning them about herself for some reason.

"That woman there," Tophet continues, this time putting their attention on a woman not quite thirty feet away. "I can make her want to do almost anything. She can resist, but she probably wouldn't. And you, Dean, if I looked I would know every thought, emotion, and desire you're having right now. Sam, well, the last thing you want to do is touch me. I would have complete control over your body and mind. I could search your memories, even the ones you think you don't have. I could know anything about you if I looked hard enough."

"Why aren't you escaping, then?"

"I wanted to meet hunters. Daddy warned me about them. I knew I could handle myself."

"You realize you can't keep doing this, right?"

"What are you gonna do to me if I don't stop?"

"We don't want to hurt you," Sam assures her. "We _won't_ hurt you. But we'll find a way."

"Well, there is a way," Tophet says. "I lied. I can't do anything right now. At least one of you is carrying some charm that's blocking my powers. If I carried it around then everyone would be safe."

The Winchesters are confused.

"Sounds like you want to stop."

"I only use my powers so I don't get headaches and weird nightmares. Daddy told me that I'm violating anyone I mess with. He doesn't care if I do, though. He said I can do what I want. And... I don't want to hurt people. I only did all that stuff to meet you."

The silence after her explanation stretches into an awkward one. Neither of them know quite what to say to her. _"Good"_?

"...Anyone hungry?" Dean asks suddenly. There's a hot dog stand some distance away.

Sam shrugs. Tophet shakes her head.

"Fuck it, I'm getting three anyway."

Dean gets up and makes a beeline. Sam shakes his head.

"Are you sure you're not hungry?" he asks the girl.

"I have a really strict diet. I can wait."

"We can go find someplace else."

"You're not planning on holding me hostage, right?"

"No, but we could at least get you a diet Coke or something."

"Not soda. Water is fine."

Sam looks at her.

"Is it the aspartame?"

Tophet looks nervous and is reluctant to answer.

"Yeah. Sort of."

"Are you phen- do you have PKU?"

She takes a deep breath like she's gathering courage.

"Sam, I don't have to read your mind to see that you know exactly who I am."

 _No_ , Sam thinks.

"You can't be her. You're too old."

"I've spent about a month in Hell. From your perspective. Me, I've been Princess of Hades for sixteen years."

"Oh my god." Sam covers his face with his hands. This can't be Mia. He doesn't want it to be Mia. They weren't supposed to lose so many years of her life. She wasn't supposed to turn into this.

"Sam, this is gonna sound weird."

He scoffs. Nothing can be weird now.

"But ever since Daddy told me about Dean and you, I've wanted to meet both of you. My own birth mother handed me to someone she hates and distrusts more than almost anyone else. She did it because you're more important than me."

"I'm not."

"You are to Dean. I can't help but hate you for that. And Dean... what can I say? Sure, Daddy followed the contract, I've had every advantage and privilege possible and I've always had the best. But he's shown me how he could have broken almost every rule Dean thought was solid. And she knew that he could do that."

"You can't trust what he says. He's a demon."

"He's my father-"

" _Stop saying that._ "

She blinks, taken aback.

"How can you call him your father?" Sam asks her.

"That's what he is to me. It's not like my biological father even knows he has a kid."

Only then does he realize that Tophet doesn't know. Why would Crowley keep that from her? Unless he somehow didn't know himself, but how could the demon remain ignorant for so long?

But Sam only nods, accepting the situation. Crowley has been more of a father to her than he has.

"My... guardian, he's someone I've always trusted. He's never lied to me. So are you going to lie to me now and say any of that isn't true?"

"You have every right to hate us. But I beg you, come with us. Give Dean a chance to prove that she's not evil. She did an unfathomably evil thing, there's no getting around it, but that's not who she is. Just... don't shut her out yet."

"Why should I give her a chance?"

"Because we're blood. You're a human, Tophet. You have never belonged with demons. But there's a place for you with us."

"There wasn't a place sixteen years ago when you were dying."

Sam despairs. If he can't convince her to stay, nothing Dean has to say will either.

"Please, Tophet. Is there anything that will make you come with us?"

"Not yet."

"'Not yet?' What does that mean?"

"It means I'm going to come back. I thought I was ready to talk to Dean if you figured out who I am, but I'm not."

"Do you swear that you'll find us again? Or let us find you?"

"I swear." She starts to get up but Sam grabs her arm again to stop her.

"Listen, Tophet." He looks her in the eye. "Even if you never come back, no matter what happens, you'll always be family to me. More than you can know, I love you."

Tophet loses some of her composure. She's no longer a confident teen but a girl lost in a world she knows little about.

"I think that's the first time anyone's said that to me and meant it," she admits.

There are no words for what it does to Sam when that sinks in.

The deal wouldn't have covered that. There was no good way to ensure she would be loved in Crowley's custody. Not only has Mia has felt unwanted by her own mother but she's been unloved her whole life. Unloved. That puts about a dozen more nails into the coffin of the idea that Dean has any defense for her decision.

"Then remember it," he tells her, nodding. "I love you."

"I will, as long as you tell Dean that you're the only person who's ever said that to me. Seems like something that would bother her."

"Deal." Sam is feeling the rusted resentment stirring within him; he has no qualms about informing Dean of another consequence.

"It was... nice to meet you, I guess. Daddy never told me much about you."

As she walks away, Sam holds his head in his hands, trying not to be physically sick.

Daddy. Unloved. Princess of Hades.

A minute later, he hears Dean.

"Sam?!" She's practically sprinting towards him. "Sam, where'd she go?"

"I let her leave."

"Why the hell would you do that?"

"She'll come back."

Dean sits next to Sam, her back against the table.

"Dude, seriously."

He lets his hands drop, and turns his head. He can only guess what his face looks like, red eyes, tears on his cheeks.

"That was Mia," Sam says when he can choke out the words.

"No," Dean says. "That's- _no!_ "

"Everything she said matched. She has PKU, she calls Crowley her father, and she knew everything from Crowley."

"Sam, she reads _and_ messes with people's minds. That couldn't be Mia. Mia's five. And she's not-"

"Not what, Dean?" Sam knows what word his sister was going to use. She rephrases herself.

"Crowley wasn't supposed to mess with her at all. If he had he would have fixed the lazy eye-"

"We need to have a talk about that."

"-so he couldn't have made her psychic. Or aged her."

"Time passes differently in Hell. And how do we know she wasn't born that way?" Sam asks. Dean isn't getting it.

"My baby wouldn't be psychic. A lot of shit happened to her but nothing would make her _psychic_."

Sam has to ignore the derision in his sister's voice.

"Your baby wouldn't be. Mine could."

Dean acknowledges the point with a long pause before continuing the debate.

"She could have been lying about not being able to use her powers near us. You were holding onto her while we walked, and she wasn't talking, remember? She butters us up with the stuff about an absent mother and what she said about her father, I walk away, and what, she just tells you?"

"I figured it out."

"You think."

"Dean, if she was going off what I knew, how did she know about the drinking? When did that happen?"

"It was early on, when I didn't want her. I thought enough stealth binge-drinking would do the trick. Tophet had access to my memories too. It doesn't prove anything."

"Tophet thinks her father doesn't know she exists. If she was messing with me, why wouldn't she bring that up?"

"It wouldn't be as believable if it was perfect."

"You don't want to admit that your daughter isn't one hundred percent human," Sam accuses. "You don't want her to be a freak."

"No, you want her to be."

"What?"

"You want that girl to be Mia because you want to have a kid who feels like a freak."

"That's the last thing I ever wanted for her. I've known that as long as I can remember, if I had kids there'd be nothing more important than giving them a place where they belonged. Don't you ever try to tell me that I want someone to feel the way I do."

The guilt grows in him then. He did try to make her feel like she was different. He told her she didn't belong with demons. He wants her to feel wrong with demons so she'll seek out her human parents.


	4. Tophet Finds Out Sam Is Her Father

####  **Sam Tells Tophet Outright**

[I was going to add a beginning to the scene later]

"You can't be my- No. No, that doesn't-" Pulling away from his grasp, Tophet shakes her head and gets up.

Sam's heart sinks as he watches her pace. He wasn't as prepared for rejection as he thought.

But it's just the initial reaction, he reminds himself.

Tophet goes over to the mirror, folding her arms tightly. She looks at him, then her reflection. Searching for similarities?

"Were you the soulless hunter, then?" she asks after a few seconds.

"Yes. My soul was in the Cage, like we told you."

"Was everything else true?"

"Yes. We just left out things that we felt were too much for you to hear at once."

She nods as her expression collapses into anguish.

"That was a good idea," she chokes out.

Fuck, she's crying. He told her the truth and it made her cry. Because she doesn't like it, it hurts. He almost wishes she would react more like he or Dean might in her shoes, get angry about not being told the whole truth from the start. He's used to dealing with that.

But now he's helpless against the pain he's caused his daughter. What is he supposed to do, or say?

Sam's own eyes grow hot with the threat of tears. First two minutes being a dad and he's lost.

Well, she's not an infant. He can ask Tophet what she needs from him.

"What do you want me to say?"

"I don't know," she chokes out. After a moment, she continues, "I feel like an idiot. It was so fucking obvious."

"You're not an idiot."

"Both of you kept hinting at it and I just... God, I'm so stupid." She retreats to the desk chair and bursts into tears, face in her hands, elbows on her knees.

"No, you're not," Sam insists. This isn't going any of the directions he was expecting.

"I am, though," she responds with a muffled voice. "This is what you were going to tell me the day Dean admitted she basically tried to abort me. And that's why she didn't want me, because I was yours."

He gives up trying to argue about her being smart or dumb; they aren't going to budge from their respective positions.

"I can't pretend things weren't... complicated, but that's in the past. It doesn't matter to us how you came to be. You are as loved and as precious to us as anyone could be."

Does she want to be left alone? he wonders after she doesn't respond.

She is fully aware of his question, but she won't answer it. She simply sobs into her hands.

It's very important right now, Sam thinks, to keep his mind open so she knows that he is being sincere, but he wishes she wouldn't have to sense how absolutely shitty he feels knowing he's made her cry and he can't fix it or take back what he said.

The tears are penance, he thinks, for everything he's done wrong. Which is a lot of things, since in regard to her, most of the time there has been no right choice to make.

Tophet wants something specific—craves might be a better word—but she also doesn't want Sam to know that she wants something. He almost hides his mind again out of respect for her privacy, but instead he speaks up.

"Whatever you need, Tophet, just tell me. Nothing has to change now that you know. I'll always be here for you, whatever you choose to call me."

She moves from the chair to the bed, right next to Sam. He puts his arm around her shoulders and she clings to him, not as a long-lost daughter but as a girl who's overwhelmed and needs someone to hold her. She wants the comfort of a friend.

He can be a friend, Sam assures her. It's okay. He isn't asking for anything from her. She never has to think of him as her father if she doesn't feel it. She knows the truth, that he loves her because she is his blood twice over. What Tophet does with that truth is up to her.

Normally, Sam is very careful about being in both physical and psychic contact with Tophet, but tonight he's brash and bold. He presses his lips to her hair.

 _I love you, Tophet,_ he thinks. Then he adds: _Mia. My daughter._

She shivers in his arms.

Sam senses her trying on the idea for size, attaching her concept of "Daddy" to him. Although he can't see anything specific, Tophet is picturing him taking Crowley's place for various life experiences.

Some seconds pass, and then Tophet pulls back enough to make eye contact. She takes a deep breath.

"You're a good person, Sam," she tells him. "Anyone would be happy to have you for a dad."

Sam tries to smile, but the latter sentence burns. What she meant was, anyone _else_. She isn't. She doesn't want him. She was happier before he told her.

*

Sam finds himself in the library, getting out the bottle of Scotch and pouring himself a glass.

It's done. She knows.

And, well, she didn't disown him. She didn't refuse to believe him. She didn't get angry.

But she cried. The truth made her cry.

"Sam?"

Dean looks confused. Not a lot makes Sam start drinking at two in the afternoon.

"I told her," he says plainly.

"Told her... about you?"

He nods.

"How'd she take it?"

"She fucking cried." It hits him hard just then. He didn't want her to cry, and the fact that the truth made her cry makes him want to shed tears, too.

"...Didn't you?"

"What?"

"When you found out she was yours, didn't you?"

Sam has to think back to the day he woke up with his memories. Did he cry? No, not then. Before he woke up. The moment he was greeted with the knowledge of what he had done, and paired it with the knowledge he had of the present.

He was trapped in his mind, and he'd just shot the manifestation of his soulless body and absorbed everything his body had done and known up until Cas broke the wall. The dreamscape was a forest, he remembers that now.

"No, I didn't. I wanted to, but I didn't."

"I cried when I peed on the stick and it came up positive two minutes later."

[scene left unfinished]

§§§

Tophet lies on her bed and cries into her pillow. She's more lost than she's ever been in her life. She's more upset over this than when she learned Daddy was a demon. She hasn't had a breakdown over anything she's learned so far, but this was the last straw.

Yes, it explains a lot. Yes, Sam is someone she likes and cares about. Yes, she did want to know her father's name after all and was too embarrassed to ask after making a point to say she didn't want to know anything.

But she didn't want this. She didn't want to find out that her father is her uncle. Not after everything else she's learned.

Sam wants her to ignore everything bad they're telling her, but how? How is she supposed to just forget that everything about her is wrong and was always wrong?

She came here to get close to them. She doesn't know what Daddy has planned but her part in it has become more personal than she expected. She didn't expect anything particularly interesting, nothing especially happy or especially bad, but almost everything that matters is bad.

She senses Dean approaching, and then Dean stops. She thinks she heard something from Tophet's room. Son of a bitch, the girl thinks.

Dean knocks on the door.

"Go away. Please," Tophet says.

"Are you okay?"

"I'm fine."

Apparently that meant she's not fine, because Dean opens the door slowly.

The girl lifts her head.

"I said I'm fine."

"Sam said he finally told you."

Tophet rests her head on the pillow again without answering. She doesn't know what it's like to talk to her mother about stuff like this. Dean's not open to it usually. Right now she is.

"Look, I get he's freakishly tall and his hair sucks, but he's a great guy," Dean tries. She closes the door behind her and sits on the side of the bed. Although she doesn't think of herself as much of a mom, this is a maternal duty for her.

Dean doesn't ask questions out loud. As much as she dislikes what Tophet can do, she's happy to rely on that so she doesn't have to admit with words how concerned she is.

"It's like every time you guys tell me something new, I think it can't get worse, but then it does," the girl says, "Like, what other shitty stuff are you hiding from me?"

"We're not hiding anything. All you have to do is ask."

"How am I supposed to know what to ask?! Everything I took for granted was wrong. Everything I assumed was normal or happy was wrong. Everything about me is wrong. So what questions do I ask?!"

"Okay, let's get something straight first. Sam and me... we think you're awesome. Sure, some details aren't perfect, but we wouldn't change a thing. We still love you."

"Why? You've known me like two weeks."

"How would I spent nine months growing you if I didn't?"

"What about Sam?"

"Sam... he took responsibility for you even when he didn't have to. He was supposed to love you as his niece, but he couldn't see you as anything less than his. He fought to call you his. He'll never stop loving you."

That matches what he said, Tophet thinks. He said he loves her unconditionally.

"He named you, you know that?" Dean says. "He felt like he shouldn't, considering, but when I heard it, I knew it was your name."

The girl thinks back to when Sam held her hand in his, and he was overwhelmed by meeting her, his daughter, finally. And he called her a name that was unfamiliar but oddly comfortable.

"Mia. He called me Mia when we met."

"You know what it means? 'Mine.'"

"...So am I yours or his?" Tophet asks,

"Sometimes you're mine. Sometimes you're his. Mostly you're ours."

"You had to know I'd be messed up, though," the teenager insists.

"As long as you had a chance to live a good life, I was going to give it to you. I only told one person besides Bobby who your dad was— _what_ he was to me—and that was the doc. He knew what to look for. He said you'd be okay."

"But you wouldn't have kept me if I wasn't going to be okay?"

Dean shakes her head. It bothers her a lot to think about giving up something so important, so Tophet finds something else to talk about.

"...I guess it's nice to know my parents are together after all. You don't fight every time you see each other."

"See? We're not all bad."

§§§

Sam keeps his distance from Tophet after telling her the truth. He doesn't avoid her, but he doesn't seek her out for anything beyond the most mundane purposes.

A day passes, and she seems withdrawn every time he sees her. He tries to let his mental guard down as much as possible, to let her know he's open to talking.

Another day passes. It's evening and Sam is in the library. Done with his laptop for the night, he gets up and closes it, idly wondering what level of physical affection Dean might be interested in tonight and what he's in the mood for if she has something in mind.

As Sam turns, he jumps at the sight of Tophet just a couple feet away from him, apparently having snuck up on him.

"Hey," he greets.

The girl seems nervous as she approaches. She won't look directly at Sam, even when they're toe-to-toe. He can't pick anything up from her mind.

Then Tophet's arms slide around him and squeeze.

For the first time, his daughter is hugging him. Knowing who he is, what he did, and how he feels.

He hugs back. He still doesn't know what she's telling him by doing this, but it doesn't matter. She's giving him a chance even if he doesn't know what it's for.

As he dares to kiss the top of her head, Sam finally receives a message from her. Just an image.

He has very few memories of his father expressing affection, but they're there. John Winchester, on rare occasions, did show his sons that he loved them.

Now, Sam sees the soft look on his father's face he both resented and craved. He understands the thing Tophet is communicating to him now. It can be summed up in one word, an honor and massive responsibility that he will never know for sure he deserves.

_Dad._

* * *

####  **Post-Some Migraine Scene In Which Sam Said He Loved Her**

As the pain recedes, hours later, Tophet is able to concentrate enough to reflect on her exchange with Sam. Which had been a lot more painful than she expected but still less than talking.

In most ways, it worked even better than she'd hoped; she didn't even know if it would work at all. Somehow he understood what she wanted him to, and she guessed correctly what his questions were.

That alone isn't special. Her uncle isn't the only person she's managed to communicate with telepathically, or even the easiest. The most unique thing was a sense of being in tune. Instead of complimenting each other or conflicting like with other psychics, they matched.

And then what happened at the very end. The image in her mind's eye was Daddy telling her that he loved her, before she knew the truth about him. She sensed how Sam felt anyway, but he was actually saying it to her in his mind.

She's seen others have those feelings, but never towards her.

It was so unlike Dean, whose love is buried under guilt, a lack of trust, and painful memories. Sam's insistence on hiding his emotions from Tophet is out of caution and a desire for privacy in his own mind. Once he let his guard down, she still couldn't tell whether he trusts her or feels anything that Dean does. He was focusing solely on understanding her until he left. Then everything was smothered. As if just her existence makes him happy. Her pain wasn't an inconvenience to him; it was just something to attend to.

She checks the time. It's 10:30 at night.

She has to talk to Sam. It's suddenly very important, like there's something on the edge of her consciousness, something she'll know once she admits to him that no one has ever said _"I love you,"_ and meant it like he did. It's the key to something; she just knows it.

She leaves her room, and heads for Sam's. If he's asleep she'll have to wait. If he happens to be dreaming, she'll pick up on it once she's a couple rooms away and won't have to check.

She senses someone in Sam's room, but it's not just Sam, and he's not dreaming, either. It's Sam and Dean.

Tophet stops in her tracks, unsure of what she's sensing. There are two sets of emotions, so similar they're blurring together.

Yes, there's love, affection, like she experienced a few hours ago. There's lust, something Tophet hasn't had the misfortune of encountering too often. There's bonding, a sense of drawing together, of two halves being made whole.

Sam probably doesn't know he's let his guard down. He isn't thinking about anything except his soulmate and bonding with his soulmate. Sexually bonding with his soulmate. Same for Dean.

Tophet turns and heads back to her room. She might accidentally alert Sam to her presence, and she really doesn't want to picture them like that anyway.

This is not what she expected. Sam and Dean are normal humans, a brother and sister. Committing incest. How long have they been sleeping together? How does that kind of thing start?

And, Tophet has to ask herself, does this mean she's been with her father all this time?

She turns her light on and stares into the mirror. Does she look like Sam? Not much more than she looks like Dean. Her hair is a little darker than Sam's. Her eyes are hazel, but a different hazel from his.

But it makes sense. He's sort of psychic, and he may have passed that on to her, and that's why she's so fucked up with the demon blood and her own power. It's how she had a really rare genetic disorder and maybe even the heart defect she had as a baby. Maybe Dean drank so much because she didn't want to have a messed up baby. And maybe that's part of why she gave Tophet away. She didn't want her.

And that's why Dean hasn't told her anything about her father. Weeks have passed and all she can remember is the exchange when she asked if he was handsome.

Dean teased her brother. She asked what he thought. He deflected it. Then Dean said that her dad was hot.

Tophet cringes a little. If Sam is her father, her parents were flirting with each other right in front of her.

Back in her room, she sits on her bed, arms crossed.

If Sam is her father, he's the reason there are so many weird things about her. She's an inbred freak, probably an accident. And for some reason either he or Dean refused to abort her.

She's angry at them for making her. They should have known that there was nothing good in store for their child.

But... Sam is nice. He understands her better than most people do. He's willing to give her a chance when Dean won't. Tophet would gladly accept the man that she's come to know over the past few weeks. She could do a lot worse when it comes to her birth father. After all, he loves her.

She has to ask. Tomorrow, as soon as she can corner one of them.

*

Six in the morning, Dean is fast asleep but Tophet can hear Sam moving around in his room. She knocks on his door.

"Tophet?"

"Can I talk to you?"

"Uh, yes, just a second."

Tophet waits three seconds before opening the door. Sam is in no more than sweatpants, looking around for his shirt in a fluster.

"Sorry," he mutters.

"It's fine," she answers. It really is, she thinks, surveying him.

Sam notices her interest and quickly pulls a v-neck on.

"Let's pretend that didn't happen."

"You know I have daddy issues," Tophet jokes. She watches his response carefully.

It's calm and dismissive:

"That's not funny. So, what did you want to talk about?"

"I just wanted to say thank you for yesterday."

"All I did was fetch a basin and keep Dean away. You're welcome, though."

"You let me sense your thoughts, after weeks of hiding."

"I think you told me that it was better than talking."

"Yes."

They stare at each other for a few seconds before Sam opens his door. Tophet follows him to the kitchen and watches him make coffee.

"Before you left," she says, "You said you loved me."

"You're my niece."

"No one's ever told me that and meant it."

"Come over here."

Tophet gets up and approaches him. He wraps his arms around her and kisses the top of her head.

"Tophet," Sam whispers to her, "you are loved here. Dean and me, we're not perfect. Sometimes we do bad. We're not what you're used to. But you deserve to feel loved and I promise, when you're here you will be."

* * *

####  **Alternate to the end of Gehenna Part One (Tophet Ch. 16)**

Dean shows up shortly after Sam mechanically starts making room for his things, room that she had naturally taken over or camouflaged in his absence.  
  
"We fucked that up," she sighs as she helps.

He grunts to acknowledge and agree with her.

Within ten minutes, they have most of his stuff back in the room and where it belongs. Sam is still angry and bitter, but calmer.

"Sam."

He looks at his sister, who clearly has some big news for him.

"What is it?"

"I know this is the worst possible time, but I think—like, ninety-nine percent certain think—I think I'm pregnant."

He just sighs.

"Well, we better not wait around. This isn't the easiest place to get an abortion. As soon as we smooth things over with Tophet, we'll go."

Dean gives him a hurt look.

"Dean, we've talked about this."

"I know."

"So you know we can't do this. We're not risking a sick, inbred kid to fulfill some selfish fantasy of making things right."

"We could at least wait until I can get tests done."

"No, because that means we want the baby. And that means we might have to abort something we want. You're not doing this."

"...You weren't like this with Tophet."

"Because I had no right to tell you what to do then."

"What makes you think you do now?"

"Because this child was conceived consensually, and because I kept my mouth shut with Tophet, best I could. But you knew I would've been against it. That's why you didn't tell me the same lie you told Bobby, because I never would've let you have her even if I thought you'd consented. You knew then and you know just as well now that I won't let you have my children if I have any say in it. It's not fair to them."

Just then, Sam detects something in the corridor. After a moment, he realizes he's picking up on his daughter's intense apprehension.

"...Oh, no," he whispers.

"What?" Dean snaps.

"Tophet," he explains, turning to the doorway. They left the door wide open. She's heard every word.

Tophet creeps into view, almost shaking. She's waiting for one of her parents to say something.

Dean folds her arms and steps back. This is all Sam and their daughter.

"You," Tophet finally says. "You hurt Dean, and you talk to me about consent?"

This is it, his daughter confronting him with his sins. All he can do is take it. She continues:

"You wouldn't even let me talk about the idea of my father not wanting me, when you just admitted you would've told her to end it. End me."

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry I ever felt that way."

"I know. But after telling me over and over no matter what I found out about myself, that I was enough, that I was still worth something, you're telling Dean to abort this baby just because it's yours and you don't want to have a sick, inbred kid. But that's exactly what I am."

"You didn't die when you were ten. That's what I'm afraid of."

"You still said it."

Sam sits on the bed, holding his head in his hands. This is just about the worst way she could have found out the truth, and her anger burns him like Dean's disappoinment. It should, because he's a hypocrite, but all he wanted was to tell her how much he loves her.

But he doesn't deserve the privilege of telling his daughter that. After everything he's done... he should have known he'd never have something with the child he forced on his sister. He was the monster. He is still the monster sometimes, like right now.

Tophet approaches him, and touches his hands.

She's sorry. She's angry about what they said about Crowley and she was shocked when she overheard what she did and realized what Sam was, so she hit him where it hurts.

Sam looks up at her. She's forgiven, of course. She was telling the truth. No need to take it back.

"Maybe I was telling the truth," she says out loud, "But what's also true is that I could do a lot worse for a father."


	5. Alternate Version of Crowley's Demise

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dub/non-con Crowley/Tophet with a side of implied Sam/Tophet
> 
> Looking back, some parts of this just make me go "yikes."

Tophet's bedroom is about what Sam would expect of a young woman in the top 1%. Luxurious but not too formal, good-smelling, and a queen-size bed with more pillows than even Dean could use. Everything is either gold, ivory, or black. The windows, he notices, have both blinds and blackout curtains.

"Are you going to tell me anything else about this plan?" he asks, keeping his voice low.

"In a minute or two, Daddy's going to come in here. I'm going to distract him. You have to keep quiet and keep your mind open, and when I give the signal..." She trails off, uncomfortable saying it.

Sam nods, although he doesn't let her sense him yet. He's going insane right now, having left Dean's body in the car covered in a blanket. She's as safe there as anywhere else, but even a half hour's delay is grating on him. Just breathe and focus on what's happening right now. They can't heal Dean right now anyway, Tophet said.

His eyes were off his daughter for a few seconds and when he looks back she's suddenly wearing only underwear.

Keeping his eyes decidedly on her face as she slips into a t-shirt and takes off her bra, he politely asks:

"What the hell are you doing?"

"Making him let his guard down." She drapes her clothes on the back of her desk chair.

Then Tophet opens a door leading to a walk-in closet. She gestures for Sam to go in.

"Wait in here. No matter what happens, don't come out until I tell you to."

Reluctantly, he enters the dark closet. Tophet carefully adjusts the door to be ajar but with Sam still hidden behind it.

"Do you give your word you won't come out until I tell you to?"

He pokes his head around to study her.

"What are you planning?"

She doesn't get a chance to answer; there is a knock at the bedroom door. Sam crouches in the dark and listens carefully as Tophet goes to answer it. He keeps one hand on the demon-killing knife.

"Daddy?"

"Yes, darling," the King's muffled voice answers. The door opens.

"Hi, Daddy." There's a pause and Sam suspects there was just a kiss on the cheek.

The door closes, Tophet retreats to her bed and it sounds like Crowley takes the desk chair.

"What did you want to talk about, love?"

"Just, um... I'm happy the Winchesters are gone, but I didn't think I'd feel this way. It was awful sensing what Dean felt when Sam died."

Only then does Sam remember that he has to listen for her signal. Of all times to forget something like that, he scolds himself.

"The memory will fade, darling," Crowley tells his daughter. "It's over now. The Winchesters will never again be the nuisance they'd proven themselves to be. ...And you are free to stay here as long as you wish with no obligations, as promised."

Sam has a soothing thought that Tophet has faith in him and that soon Crowley will be dead and everything will turn out alright. Thank you, he thinks at his daughter.

"About that, I, uh, heard you order Lester to take Sam to the Chamber."

"I facilitated Sam and Dean's meeting you. We had an arrangement and debt doesn't vanish upon death."

She feigns ignorance:

"You didn't already, um... do it, did you?"

"Not yet. I've had other matters to attend to. This in fact is the last one."

"Then don't do it, Daddy, please."

"Why ever not?"

"He doesn't deserve it."

"It's his corpse: he'll never know the difference."

"I will," Tophet says. "I'll know you did it. I'm not asking you to even bury him, just don't do that to him."

"If I possess his body rather than sodomize it, would that be more acceptable?" Crowley asks, in a patronizing tone.

Sam feels sick to his stomach. Dead or not, that would be worse by far.

"No. Just leave him alone, please."

Sam hears the slow footsteps of thoughtful pacing before Crowley responds.

"You know, darling, I thought that kiss was a nice touch until he started to reciprocate. Dean was as shocked as I was."

"Honestly, Daddy, I think she was worried Sam and me were sleeping together." She giggles a little.

"Were you?"

"Daddy!"

"Well?"

Jealousy. Sam gets it now. She's making Crowley jealous. He'll get possessive and want to re-claim her.

Though he understands her course of action, Sam protests. He doesn't want any demon touching her again. It's _wrong_ , he informs her.

"No..." Tophet sounds uncomfortably like her mother right now, telling flirtatious, obvious lies.

"Don't lie to me."

"I missed having sex," she confesses. "And... Sam was there. Later he said he didn't know how to say no to me without telling me the truth."

Though mildly insulted, Sam makes no comment.

"I knew you'd miss it," the demon says.

"I don't want to do it all the time like before, just... once in a while. Sometimes."

Crowley, Sam guesses, stands up and takes a couple steps. A few seconds later, there's a soft moan. Sam isn't shy about communicating his disgust and dismay to Tophet. In return he is told to shut up because this is hard enough already with an audience.

Sam recognizes the whisper of clothes and feels like crying or being sick.

This would probably be easier with Dean. She's a fully grown woman who's experienced enough things, sexual and non-sexual, to give informed consent. This innocent nineteen year old girl-

He receives harsh information that Tophet has done kinkier things with the demon than he's ever done with his sister. She reminds him of Crowley's words earlier about imagining the things she's begged him to do to her.

"I missed you so much, Daddy," Tophet confesses in a whisper, no trace of the bitterness she displayed toward Sam.

"I missed you far more than I had expected." There are more whispered words from Crowley, unintelligible to Sam. To his alarm, he then hears footsteps approaching the closet.

Tophet, sans sweatpants, slips inside. She closes the door behind her, waiting as long as is reasonable before turning on the light.

Without more than a slight blush in her cheeks, Tophet strips herself completely. Sam stares at the floor but she crouches next to him.

"If you can't look at me now, Sam," she whispers in his ear, "how are you going to handle the next fifteen minutes?"

He looks her in the eye. He never agreed to this in the first place.

"It's the only way to sneak up on him." She stands and rifles through a drawer.

Sam can admit that sex is not a time that anyone is especially on their guard, and he's still undetectable by demons for the moment. But why does Tophet have to subject herself to this?

Tophet puts on a sheer lace negligée. She checks herself out in the mirror in the back of the closet, which Sam hadn't noticed.

When he forces himself to really look, he observes a nearly naked but confident young woman. Even if Sam never wanted to see this much of his daughter, he's sort of proud of the way she holds herself. She's on a mission and even with nothing left to the imagination it doesn't permit for sexual thoughts. Beauty may be in the eye of the beholder, but context is hers. She could be actually naked and she would still be in control of how she's seen. Right now, Sam couldn't be turned on unless she wanted him to be.

Still, he questions in his mind if she's sure about this. She leans down to whisper in his ear, explaining her entire plan with one depressing statement:

"This is the only time I can hate him."

And that ends Sam's arguments. This is the only way for her to let him kill the demon she once loved as a father. She wants to remember him as a monster, not as a parent.

She straightens up and, right in front of Sam, inexplicably adopts an erotic, seductive air, with a hint of vulnerability. His face in the mirror turns red and he has to avert his eyes. Whether this overall would be easier with his sister remains a mystery, but it would be very hard right now if Dean was wearing and doing that. As it is, he doesn't dare look at Tophet again. Just as he was not permitted to see her in a sexual light a moment ago, now Sam has absolutely no control over how his body might react to the image. It must have something to do with their psychic link; he refuses to believe that a change in posture alone can force his thoughts down that road.

Now he has been unfaithful to Dean twice today. At least he can explain the kiss.

Tophet takes his extreme discomfort as a compliment and exits the closet, switching off the light again but leaving the door mostly open. Sam is still hidden but he can see a strip of the room reflected in the mirror, including part of the bed.

"I'm ready, Daddy," Tophet says, her tone sultry but submissive. Sam keeps his eyes on her hair. Just like Mom's. Think about Mom.

"Beautiful as always." Crowley, suit jacket absent, approaches her.

Sam lets himself look away for the next couple minutes. Tophet isn't going to summon him until the demon is well into fucking her, so he just listens to the cringeworthy rustle of clothes coming off, the disgusting smack of wet kisses, and a dozen other little sordid noises that he wishes he didn't recognize.

"Why did you say you missed me more than you expected?" Tophet asks eventually.

Sam glances up. They're on the bed. And now he has the image in his head of a naked Crowley with an equally naked Tophet in his lap. Forever. His daughter is still in seduction mode and Sam stares at the space between their faces because it's the least uncomfortable thing to keep his eyes on.

"I admit, darling, I haven't been entirely straightforward with you," the demon replies.

"I know you hold things back. You know best."

"I may have misled you on some occasions, however."

"...Oh."

"The truth is, you have been a pawn, Tophet. Nearly everything I've said to you and done for you has been working towards what we did today, and I am immensely proud of you."

"But... you never really wanted me, did you?"

"You're far too delicate for the things I want, Tophet. You were precious, and although I played with you, I had to keep you safe until it was time."

"To meet Sam and Dean?"

"Yes."

"...Then what happens now?"

"Once a pawn reaches the opposite end of the chessboard, it becomes a queen. I may not have any use for you now, but you have all the power and freedom you could ask for."

"What about the things you want? The things you think I'm too delicate for?"

Crowley runs his hand through her hair, then wraps it around his hand, tighter and tighter until she whimpers in pain. He pulls her head away and pushes down until she gets into the position he wants. Without so much as a pause, he opens her mouth with his free hand and pushes it down onto his cock. Rather than let her pleasure him, he moves her head as he wishes.

Sam demands that Tophet allow him to end this. He will not watch her be raped.

No, she tells him.

He informs her that he would rather let the demon live than let her go through this.

Even as he says it, he's aware that it's too late; this is going to happen.

"You don't like pain, Tophet," Crowley reminds her. "You don't like this. You could never withstand the things I would truly enjoy doing to you."

Tophet is allowed to reply:

"But you don't care if I like it, do you? Wouldn't it make you happier to hurt me when you know I don't like it?"

"You're a clever girl, Tophet," the demon remarks. "Is that what you want, to make me happy?"

"I love you, Daddy. I don't want to have sex all the time, but I still want you to touch me sometimes, and if there's a way I can make things even better for you-"

"Get my belt, darling." Crowley lets go of her hair and she gets off the bed to grab the item from his pants.

Sam experiences a state of minor shock as he processes that there is really nothing left to his imagination now. As a result he misses the next few words between Crowley and his daughter, and when he dares to look at the mirror again he's greeted with the nauseating image of Tophet on her hands and knees at the foot of the bed. He can't see anything else but the King of Hell is probably standing behind her. Penetrating her.

The clink of a belt buckle tells Sam that things are about to get worse. Probably the demon is wrapping it around his hand, leaving one end loose to beat her with.

It's the only time she can hate him, Tophet said. She wants to remember him as a monster who celebrates the pain of others, a being who never loved her and never could have anyway.

Sam informs his daughter that the moment Crowley looks the other way, he's doing it. He will not stand around while she's being beaten for a monster's pleasure. The demon is angled away from the closet door, but if he turns his head at all he will notice Sam's approach.

She cries out when Crowley strikes her the first time. He's using the malicious end, the end with the buckle.

Pulling the knife from its sheath, Sam practically growls. He is murderous. It doesn't matter what Crowley is or what he's done in the past. All that matters is that this monster is hurting someone Sam loves, and it must die.

"Talk to me, Daddy," Tophet pleads as the demon begins lazy, casual thrusts. "Tell me I'm yours."

He hits her again first.

"You've been mine since the moment you were born." He strikes her yet again. "You are my Princess."

The sound of the belt buckle is going to haunt him for a long time, Sam reflects, just as he gets a desperate plea from Tophet to stop Crowley.

She twists her neck to try to face her father.

"I love you, Daddy," she says.

He leans down:

"You," he hisses, "are my favorite thing to hurt."

He howls in pain after those words, for Sam has snuck up behind him and plunged the blade into Crowley's back.

"And you," Sam tells the demon, "should have given my daughter back when you had the chance."

He pulls away, taking the knife with him, and watches Crowley fall to his knees, not quite dead, as Tophet scrambles away.

Sam kicks the demon down to the floor on his back, and grins maniacally at the utter shock and horror on the demon's face.

Crowley looks up at the bed.

"Tophet, what have you done?!" he demands.

"The right thing!" Whatever triumphant words she had after that are lost as she begins to cry.

Her part is done, as far as Sam is concerned; he doesn't spare a second glance in her direction. Instead, without a shred of remorse, he drops to his knees and does the cruelest, most painful thing he can think of, which is to stick his knife into the demon's scrotum.

"Look at me, you son of a bitch!" he shouts over the deafening cry of pain.

Crowley looks.

"You were her father. She loved you," Sam concedes. "But she... is... _mine_!"

The King of Hell dies once Sam stabs him in the heart and leaves the blade there.

He gets to his feet, panting. One more monster dead. As loud as they were, it doesn't seem that anyone is coming to investigate. For now, things seem safe.

He turns to his daughter then.

All Sam sees at first are the red marks all over her back and the way she's shaking. She's crawled into a fetal position and covered her head with a pillow, either to hide herself or to muffle her sobs, or both.

At a loss, he stands there for a few seconds. He just killed someone she loves, or loved, yet he's the only person around who can offer her comfort right now. They can't stay here long; they have to get out, get somewhere safe. They need to save Dean.

He heads to the closet and digs around in a few drawers until he finds a soft blanket, one that looks a little worn and well-loved. It's lilac-colored which explains why it's hidden away from the elegantly coordinated bedroom.

Returning to the bed, Sam finds Tophet in the same position as before, and he wraps the blanket around her before pulling her upright and letting her lean against him. He's careful to sit so that she can't see the body.

He puts an arm around her and kisses her forehead.

"We have to keep moving."

She nods, understanding, but then she crawls into his lap, asking to be held tightly.

Sam squeezes her as tightly as he can without hurting her. It does seem to soothe her, and after a minute she lets him know that she's ready to go on. He guides her to the closet and waits for her to pick up her discarded underwear before leaving her alone. After retrieving his knife from the dead meatsuit, he grabs a sheet from the bed and drapes it over the corpse.

He did it, he and Tophet. He waits for some kind of triumph or satisfaction to set in, but he's only numb. He can't feel good about this, knowing how much it hurts someone he loves.

*

Soon, they're on their way. After two unexpected turns in the corridors, however, Sam realizes that they aren't leaving the mansion quite yet.

"Where are we going?" he whispers.

It's important, Tophet communicates to him. She might be nonverbal for a little while, Sam thinks (or possibly was just informed).

They encounter two demons on the way, neither of which are prepared to see Sam Winchester with the Princess of Hades.

Finally they arrive at a door guarded by another pair. Again, Tophet's spell and Sam's knife take care of them. Then Tophet opens the door, gesturing for Sam to wait outside.

"We're here to take you away," she says to someone. "You have to be very quiet until we say it's okay to talk, alright?"

A small girl comes out into the corridor. This is a plot twist, Sam reflects with a frown.

Brown-haired and hazel-eyed, she's pale and thin. She's been living in that room for a long time, but apparently Tophet just learned about her recently. Sam crouches to her level, and has an impulse to look at her hands.

There are scars on her fingers, like they've been severed and put back, and then Sam knows exactly who she is. She's the decoy. _This_ is the child he wronged by continuing his search for Mia. Her fingers were the ones he held those years ago.

"Hey there," he greets. He clears his throat before continuing. "My name's Sam. What's yours?"

"Lilith."

Sam blinks a few times, unsettled. Crowley has, well, had an uncomfortable sense of humor.

"Lilith. Um... Is it okay if I call you Lilly?" he asks.

She nods.

"Alright, Lilly. Can you be brave for me until we get out of here?"

She nods.

"Is it alright if I carry you?"

She nods again. Sam takes her in his arms, thanking Tophet for doing this, for saving this girl. It's almost like he's found Mia.

*

They all get into the front seat of the Impala, Lilly in Tophet's lap. The little girl had to close her eyes when they first came outside; the sun is brighter than any light she's been exposed to in five years. She's starting to peek now, catching glimpses of the outside world for the first time. She asks a lot of questions which Sam has to answer, because his daughter has simply stopped speaking.

Meanwhile, Dean's body hidden in the backseat is like a ringing in his ears. He prays that he can save her.


	6. Explicit Sam/Tophet (PWP)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Because the sexual tension between Sam and Tophet had to be explored no matter how awkwardly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (In case it wasn't clear in the previous chapter, yes, I was going to give Tophet supernatural powers of seduction.)

####  **Sexy Ending to the Alternate Crowley Dying Scene**

Returning to the bed, Sam finds Tophet in the same position as before, and he wraps the blanket around her before pulling her upright and letting her lean against him. He's careful to sit so that she can't see the body.

He puts an arm around her and kisses her forehead.

"I know this is hard, Tophet, but we have to keep moving."

She nods, understanding, but then she crawls into his lap, asking to be held tightly.

He presses her close to his body, and it's a quiet, soothing moment until she kisses him.

"What are you doing?"

"I want you to touch me the right way, Sam. Show me how it's supposed to happen."

"Tophet, I'm with Dean."

"She'll forgive you. I promise."

The girl kisses him again and this time he doesn't pull away. The kiss lasts long seconds and Tophet shifts in his lap while his eyes are closed.

He hears the blanket fall to the floor and makes the mistake of opening his eyes. Even after being traumatized, she can exude sensuality, sexuality, and once Sam lays eyes on her body, he's lost.

"We shouldn't," he tries one last time.

"We need to."

Sam bites his lip, not wanting to do anything to indicate how his cock has stiffened and how badly he wants to open his jeans and touch himself or let Tophet do it.

"Tophet, what do you need?" he asks. "There has to be another way for you to feel what you want to feel."

"Sam, right now you're the only man I can trust to show me what it's like to- to make love. I need you to show me that, now."

He squeezes his eyes shut, knowing it's wrong but for the best reason.

"If you promise to tell me to stop if you get uncomfortable, or even have a question, or anything, then I'll show you. But you have to promise you'll speak up for yourself if I do something you don't love."

"I promise."

With that, Sam kisses her with all the passion in his heart. Tophet moans softly when he starts stroking her thigh.

"We didn't even get started yet," he reminds her. He shrugs off his jacket, then starts to unbutton his shirt. Tophet helps him and they get it off in record time. He peels off his v-neck and toes off his shoes before taking Tophet with him into a lying position on the bed.

"Aren't you going to take your pants off?" she asks.

"Soon. It's not about me, Tophet." He puts his arms around her smooth, warm body and presses his face to her chest. She smells good, and his cock hardens as he rubs his cheek against her breast, then wraps his mouth around her nipple.

She gasps and presses herself against him.

"Promise me, Sam, tell me that you'll make love to me," she whispers after a few seconds.

"I promise."

She reaches down and gropes him, which feels more wrong than he can describe, but also incredible.

"Sam, it's okay to want me," she adds. "Touch me the way you want."

He practically tears off his pants and grinds his cock against her body. She parts her legs and grinds right back, her pussy getting his shaft wet and slippery.

* * *

####  **Sometime After Crowley Is Killed**

Sam finds Tophet in her room, listening to something on her phone. He opens his mind and she immediately sets it aside.

"Are you okay, Sam?"

"Yeah, of course."

"You don't seem like it."

He sits on the corner of the bed.

"I guess I just wanted to ask you about something you did."

"Which was?"

"When you kissed me."

"Oh. You know I only did it so I could slip the hex bag in."

"Did you?"

Tophet blushes.

"Well, father or not, I can't exactly help having feelings."

"Well, I hope I didn't... give you false hope or anything by kissing you. I was just trying to get through to you."

"Were you?" she fires back with a smirk.

"Yes..." He thought he was. Maybe it was also... "I guess I'm still angry at Crowley for doing what he did, for touching you. When I had the chance, I... claimed you."

She nods. Sam is embarrassed that there are so many dysfunctional, degenerate things between himself and Tophet, when he thought maybe he would have a semblance of a normal father-daughter relationship with her.

"You could claim me in other ways," she says. Sam doesn't get pictures or anything but he knows her thoughts are explicit.

"I'm not free, you know."

"Is Dean going to be that upset?"

Sam isn't sure how it happens but he finds himself wanting her. He finds himself wanting Tophet more than he disgusts himself by doing this.

"Is this really what you want?"

"Yes."

He moves closer and touches her face.

"You want me to touch you, to kiss you? You want to touch me?"

"Yes, Sam." She lays her hand on his chest. He takes it and kisses her fingers, because plain lust will not do. She needs to feel the things she didn't feel with Crowley.

"I want to do the opposite of what he did to you," he tells her. "I want you to say what you want. Tell me what to do to you."

"I don't know. I mean, I want to be kissed."

Sam pulls her almost into his lap and kisses her, tongues in each other's mouths, hands on each other's bodies.

When they pause, Tophet breathes:

"I didn't know just kissing would feel different."

"Trust me, everything will feel different."

"I want you to touch me." Tophet pulls off her shirt, revealing a black, lacy bra. Sam can't believe he's looking at her and feeling desire, but he is. She's so innocent and yet so hurt; he needs to help her.

"Do you usually take off your clothes?"

"Usually he did."

"Then I want you to take your clothes off exactly when you want to. Be in charge, Tophet. I want to do things to you, but you have to command me."

"I'd like you to strip to your underwear," she says shyly. She moves out of the way and watches as Sam tugs everything off and throws it on the floor. There's a bulge in his briefs and her eyes lock on to it as she removes her bra.

Sam nearly naked, and Tophet in just jeans, it's a strange scene. She reaches and runs her hand over the bulge, which twitches under her touch.

"I- I don't know what I want now."

"Do you want me to touch you? Up here? Down there? Somewhere else?"

"Up here." Tophet leans into the touch as he massages and squeezes her breasts, flicking his thumbs over her nipples. "And I'd like to see you. All of you."

Sam pauses to shove his briefs to his ankles and shake them off his feet. When Tophet gets a good look at his cock, she inhales sharply.

"You're big."

"You afraid I won't fit?"

"I don't know."

"I'll get off whatever way will make you happy, Tophet."

"Then, uh, don't touch it yet. Just touch me."

"Do you want a kiss?"

"Yes." She leans in and they press their lips together.

"You're beautiful, Tophet," Sam tells her.

"Thank you. ...I want to undress the rest of the way now."

"Alright, go ahead." Sam lets go and tries not to watch too closely as she peels off her jeans and panties. He can't help whispering in awe when she's done: "Wow."

"What?"

"I- I can't wait to touch you. Tell me what to do."

"Let me be on top."

"Sure."

Sam lies on his back, hips circling the slightest bit as he watches Tophet's thighs spread above his. He needs friction but this is about her.

"What do you want now?" he asks.

"Just... hold my hand." Tophet reaches with her left hand to grasp his right. Her free hand she uses to rub his cock against her clit, her face contorting in a new pleasure.

Sam exhales sharply when she changes things up a little. She's stroking him in addition to stimulating herself, and it's an even more beautiful sight that she is enjoying sex with another person.

"I'd like you to do something to me, Sam," she says a moment later.

"What kind of thing?"

"I think I want you to be inside me."

"Where do you want to be?" he asks as he sits up.

"Underneath."

"Alright, then." Sam grabs a pillow and puts it under Tophet's hips when she lies on her back.

"What's the pillow for?"

"You'll see. Well, feel."

She smiles as she spreads her legs for him.

"You ready?" he asks.

"Yes." Tophet reaches down and guides his cock in, eyes widening as he goes deeper than she's used to. She moans his name for the first time: "Sam..."

"Does it hurt?"

"No, it's fine. It's just different. I feel... I don't know." She lifts her head to kiss him, just a romantic kiss but it gives Sam a thrill nonetheless. "Do it, Sam."

He gives a gentle thrust of the hips, then another as her body relaxes. Then he's off, not thinking about much more than how good she feels and how good he wants to make her feel. He wants to protect her from bad things, to show her what's right and good and what she deserves.

Tophet gasps as he picks up the pace.

"Oh, Sam- Sam!" It's like she's fighting for her own pleasure, fighting for what she wants, and it's exactly what Sam was hoping for.

"Feel good?"

"Yes, oh god. Can you go faster? Harder?"

Sam does as she asks. She gasps so sharply it's almost a shriek.

"Sam, Sam, Sam, oh, please, don't stop! Sam!" Her back arches and she can't seem to control herself or the sounds coming from her body. "Oh my god!"

Sweat dripping off his body, Sam finds it within himself to go just a little harder, just a little faster. He's getting so close himself, he's swearing under his breath.

The moment Tophet comes is perfect to Sam. She's sweaty and yet at peace. She's euphoric and yet secure.

Sam can't think about it any longer, as he's so close to the edge himself. Even though he slows down, it's too much and he comes inside his daughter with a groan.

* * *

**After Sam and Dean Find Out About Crowley/Tophet, But Before She Learns the Truth**

"If what Daddy does is so wrong, show me what's right," Tophet presses.

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know. Kiss me."

"Tophet, I- I can't do that. I'm way too old, I'm your uncle-"

"You care about me. I think you might even love me. That's a step up from a centuries old adoptive father who's a demon."

"I'm not as bad, but that doesn't make it okay. I love you, but as my niece. I don't see you that way."

"I know. I'm not asking for you to fall in love with me. I'm asking you to show me what it's like to be kissed by a human being."

Sam shakes his head.

"Alright, I'll do it. But only so that you have one experience in your life of asking for this from someone and getting it."

"Got it."

Tophet takes a step closer to him, and waits. He's uncomfortable but seems to gather himself a bit and then cups her cheek with his hand. She tilts her head up and he leans down to gently kiss her lips.

It does feel nice. Sam is very good-looking, after all. He resists at first when the tip of her tongue touches his lips, but then he relents and allows their tongues to mingle.

He's let down his mental guard, maybe to show Tophet that he doesn't want this to go further but also show her the respect and love he believes she should feel.

Even with his insistence that he doesn't want this to get more sexual, Tophet can't stop herself from resting her hands on his chest. She really, really likes this and Sam.

He doesn't want to stop her. This is about her. This is about showing her what's right versus what's wrong.

All Tophet can think is that she knows what would feel right and that would be for Sam to offer more touch. She takes his free hand and presses it to her breast. He's too shocked to know what to do when she makes him squeeze her.

"Sam," she whispers, "please show me more."

He's desperate; he wants to help her and do what she asks, but it's wrong in a hundred ways. He can't.

"How?" he asks her. "How can I show you more?"

"You've had sex, right?" she asks. "What's the next step in having sex with someone you love?"

"It depends," he tells her. "You decide. This is about you being in charge."

Never having had to make such a decision before, Tophet needs a moment. But then she decides.

"Touch me," she pleads, laying his hand on her body, "touch me."

Sam hates himself for it but his tender hand spreads over her breast, and he squeezes gently.

"Yes," Tophet whispers, as pleasure threads through her body. "Sam..."

"Do you want to touch me, Tophet?"

"Yes," she answers immediately. "Can I?"

"Go ahead."

At first she keeps her hands above the belt, but as the feeling between her legs gets stronger she's driven to take things lower. As she palms his crotch, she realizes how big he is.

"You're huge," she gasps. She rubs him through his jeans, heart pounding as his member firms under the denim.

"What do you want, Tophet?" he whispers.

"I want- I don't know. I want... I want you to see me."

"I do see you."

"No, I want to be naked for you." Tophet pulls away and starts to strip. It's odd, she doesn't feel shy in front of Sam the way she does with Daddy. It used to be difficult for her to do this for her father, but with Sam, she _wants_ him to see her naked body.

When she's bare, Sam looks at her, blushing.

"You're beautiful, Tophet," he says. "I mean it."

"I know you do." She can sense his emotions clearly. He still doesn't see her sexually. "I want you to want me. And if you can want me, at all, then I want to touch again."

Sam's eyes linger on her firm breasts, and then on the space between her legs, which she keeps shaved bare out of habit. Tophet badly wants him to feel desire for her, and after a few seconds, he decides he can.

"If you want me, Tophet, then make me desire you," he tells her. "Do whatever you want to do, whatever will make you happy, to make me want you."

"I'm not sure what will work the best."

"It's not about what will work. It's about what you're happy to do. What do you want to do with your body now?"

"Your hands. I want your hands on me."

Sam steps forward and caresses her skin as if he's worshipping her. He kisses her again and that gives Tophet the courage to grope him again. He's a little harder than before.

"You don't have to do that."

"I want to."

"Then I'm going to take my clothes off if that's okay with you."

"Yes."

Sam is the shy one now as he strips. He knows he is doing a bad thing, but this is for Tophet. There's also a hint of vindictiveness in his decision.

"I've never... _wanted_ to see a man before," she admits. She looks at the lines of his muscles, the sheer amount of skin in front of her, his cock maybe half-hard. She reaches for it and strokes it. It makes her feel good to see his body react to her.

She feels like she's in control.

"Will you get on the bed with me?" she asks.

He nods, and they lay facing each other on their sides.

"Touch me again, Sam."

"Get on your back."

She obeys easily, smiling without meaning to as he straddles her. He's protecting her.

His head lowers to her chest and sucks on one of her nipples. His tongue flicks over it and Tophet moans. Daddy almost never did this. But Sam, Sam considers this normal. He likes doing this normally, and he even kind of likes it now. After all, it's making Tophet happy. All this touch and sensuality, it's about her for the first time.

"Oh, Sam..." she breathes. She feels an urge to spread her legs. "I want you inside me. I really do. I'm... Please. I want it."

"Are you sure?" he asks.

"Yes. I've never needed it like this before. I'm- I need something inside me."

"Tell me more."

"I don't know. It's like being turned on but stronger, I just need to spread my legs, I need something there. I'm... I'm almost aching for it. I can't wait, Sam, please." She reaches down and finds his cock. "I want this inside me, right now."

The most he decides to allow it, Tophet wraps her legs around his waist and pulls him closer. She presses the head of his cock against her clit.

"This feels amazing, Sam. I didn't know it would feel so different."

"It will be even better when you find the right person."

Tophet guides his cock into her opening and sighs in satisfaction.

"I'm happy right now."

"Are you sure this is what you want?"

"Yes, Sam. I want you to feel good."

He pulls out an inch, pushes in again. He repeats the delicate movements for almost a minute before Tophet can't stand it and starts to roll her hips with him.

"Faster, Sam, please."

He adjusts her hips slightly, then speeds up. Tophet feels amazing. There is a difference, she realizes, between human sex and sex with a demon. A loving human is a much, much better partner.

A few minutes pass before either of them speak again.

"Tophet, I'm about to-" For the first time Sam seems to be enjoying himself. He slows down a little, both to prolong his pleasure and give them a little more time.

"Say it," she urges.

"I'm going to come, Tophet."

"Do it inside me."

"I will."

Sam's thrusts become more forceful, the pace more erratic. Then his eyes close and he lets out a soft groan as his hips roll against her one last time.

Tophet feels another thrill watching it. She feels special like she would for Daddy, but this is different. She asked for this.

Sam's eyes open and he feels shame, guilt, over what he's done. But he pretends he doesn't.

"Let's take care of you now," he whispers as he pulls out. "What's your favorite way to get off?"

"I don't know. I just use my fingers."

"No one's ever gone down on you?"

"No."

"Would you like that?"

"Yes."

Without another word, Sam shuffles back, and puts Tophet's legs over his shoulders. He presses a kiss to each of her thighs, then with his nose and lips starts to explore her sex.

He's not even really touching her, and Tophet knows this is going to be good.

Then his fingers part her flesh, and his tongue passes over her clit.

"Oh my god," she moans as he goes to work. "Sam."

He's gentle with her body but his tongue is vigorous. Tophet claps a hand over her mouth to keep herself quiet but her moans can't be stifled.

She can't hold still, and it's even hotter when Sam has to hold her hips down with his other hand.

Then she goes over the edge, barely containing her scream of pleasure. She thrashes, unable to cope with what Sam is still doing to her. It's never felt so good before.

* * *

####  **After Chapter 31**

[Originally, Mia and Sam were going to make a deal before her little sister was born, that if there was any ever danger to Violet, Mia would take her away from Sam and Dean and the Life. Sam is kissing her so he can read her mind clearly and decide whether to make the deal.]

Mia's response should be enough, but Sam asks for more reassurance. He has to be as positive as possible.

Mia informs him that the only way to be more certain would be to be more physically intimate, which she doesn't expect from him.

No, he says. He wants to believe her. Do it.

That might mean going all the way, she warns him.

That's okay. He has to.

Their tongues mingle. It's wrong; his body and mind is telling him it's wrong. He can't do this.

But he has to be sure. He has to know that saying yes is the right thing to do.

Mia is nervous, but she seems to realize that she's going to have to initiate further touching. At first it's just her palm on his chest.

He has his hands on her waist—not an inherently sexual gesture—but then he follows the slight curve of her hips. The sexual thrill she gets from it transfers over their mental link, and it arouses Sam. She wishes to be possessed by his body; his body can't help but react to that and to the way that Mia is pressed up against him. His mouth becomes hungry for hers. He's more forceful, and imagines his neglected body being allowed to partake of hers.

 _Are you ready to do this?_ he asks her with his mind.

Mia is ready, and she wants to know that he is, too.

He is. He is ready to do anything to ensure the safety of his helpless new daughter.

And so he lays Mia down on the bed. She's started to unbutton her shirt, but Sam stops her from opening it. It's not time yet. He won't hurt her by taking things too fast, not allowing her body to be ready for his.

She wonders if he's big. She thought he was big before but she tried not to look.

Yes, he is.

She's excited for that. Sam's cock hardens enough that the hard bulge presses against Mia's hip as he caresses her. She wants to feel it, see it, have it inside her. She wants him to feel pleasure with her body.

He gently rubs the heel of his palm between her thighs. She moans softly.

"Yes," she whispers, as if he couldn't sense her physical happiness a hundred other ways.

Both of them are still fully clothed. If they stop now, they can forget the lines they crossed without having seen any more of each other than before.

Sam can't stop. He opens Mia's shirt and kisses his way from her throat to her small breasts, contained in a black lace bra.

She reaches underneath herself and unclasps her bra. Sam helps her out of her shirt, tosses her bra on the floor, and flicks his tongue over one of her nipples.

She inhales sharply.

"Sam, I've never wanted someone inside me as much as I want you. I- I _need_ you inside me." She wraps her still denim-clad legs around his waist, tries to pull his hips closer to hers. He obliges her by grinding his erection against the crotch of her jeans. It's good, it's relief, but he needs more.

Slowly, the rest of their clothes come off. Sam looks down at his daughter.

She's not Dean, no, but she had a pleasant shape and scent. She's so turned on from this that his body can do nothing but be aroused in turn. She's quivering with anticipation as she looks between his fully hard, erect cock and his face.

She spreads her legs.

"I want you to take me."

Sam does take her, gently guiding his cock into her body.

She closes her eyes tight. It hurts a little, but she doesn't want him to stop. Stay, she says.

Of course, Sam thinks. He does, however, pull out about an inch and then push back in. Mia bites her lip. It's what she wants, she communicates, she just needs a few more seconds.

She takes a few more deep breaths, and then begins to rock her hips slightly.

They fall into a pleasant rhythm—easy when two people can communicate psychically. Mia is right; joined like this they can sense each other's minds better than ever. Sam recognizes the depth of her feelings for him. She cares for him as a father first, though she appreciates his appearance and is happy to submit to him sexually. She honestly enjoys doing this, though she knows it will never happen again.

And when he asks her again to promise that this agreement they're making will be upheld above all else, she says yes again. She will keep her word as long as she draws breath.

Then yes, Sam tells her. He will do it.

They kiss again, this time to make the deal binding.

Mia wonders if he wants to finish, or if he only wanted to know that her word was good.

They got this far, Sam reasons. They might as well complete the act.

Mia is very pleased with this answer.

A minute later, she knows she's getting close. She's surprised; she's never gotten so far from simple penetration.

Her pleasure intensifies Sam's; he's closer than he thought.

Maybe he should pull out, he thinks.

No, Mia says. Come inside her.

With that, he's over the edge. At first it's merely good, but then Mia's orgasm takes over, and their minds can no longer be distinguished from each other.

They are truly one being. Sam and Mia feel the same pleasure throughout their bodies; they are moaning with the same voice. Their bodies move together still, Sam's body refusing to end its climax until Mia's does. But they are one body. As long as one is in the throes of orgasm, so shall the other.

"Oh, God..." one of them says. "Oh, God!"

They just can't stop. One of them keeps thrusting, their member continuing to give them both pleasure. One of them keeps rocking against the movement, stimulating the both of them.

They remember doing this with Crowley. It was never this good with Crowley.

They remember doing this with Dean. It's never lasted like this with Dean.

They wonder if this could go on forever, their bodies and minds reflecting off of each other like an eternity of mirrors.

But then they remember that it can't. Dean is in the bunker.

They pull apart, panting.

"Wow," Sam breathes.

"Yeah," Mia responds.

He flops on his back next to her, covering his face with his hands.

That was incredible, wrong, necessary, and sickening, and he'll never forget it.

"I hope I didn't ruin things between you and Dean."

"No," Sam reassures her. "You aren't her. That was different, but you couldn't replace what it feels like with Dean."

"I know. I wouldn't want to."

They look at each other for a few seconds. Sam gives his daughter a kiss on the cheek.

"After this is all over, I'm going to tell her about this."

"It wasn't your idea," she reminds him.

"Doesn't really help," he scoffs.

**Author's Note:**

>   
>  Does posting my failed drafts give me a moral high ground over Chuck?  
> 


End file.
